Earning a voice without losing your voice

Where would we be without the right person, at the right time, saying the right thing about a certain wrong behavior.  We can point to William Wilberforce and the slave trade in England or Martin Luther King Jr. and the treatment of African Americans or even Mother Teresa and the treatment of social outcasts.  They, among many others, choose to address and judge culturally acceptable behavior as wrong. 

I will argue that what gave them that voice, is a combination of two things:  Their willingness to EARN that voice through their actions and their foundation being from something much greater than themselves.

Their actions not only prove how deep they believed in their cause, but their actions also go on to prove how ridiculous the cultural norm was that they were fighting against. 

What gave them even more of a voice and what, ultimately, led to great societal change, was the fact that their judgments were based on a higher authority, voiced in the Bible by God Himself.  It’s clear that they were fueled by a higher calling because in each of these cases, they continued doing what they did until they died, without ever seeing much (if any) cultural change.

What is that cultural change that needs to happen today?  We need an accurate, thoughtful, respectful view of homosexuality.  The church, then, needs to be on the forefront of promoting both truth regarding what the Bible says about homosexuality as well as unconditional love and compassion to all people . . . ALL people, because they ALL deserve it.

Yes, I agree, the church has lost its voice because we have NOT faithfully done either of the two aforementioned necessities.  We have not accurately portrayed the truth of Scripture nor have we accurately modeled Christ-like love.

I started this blog in early 2014 and have yet to post it after tweaking it here in May, 2015.  As I continue to revisit this topic and observe how society is handling it, my original premise, which is based on Scripture being the authority, will hold true:  The current societal norm regarding homosexuality will eventually be found out for what it is, a submission to what feels right through the path of least resistance as opposed to a submission to what's right.

Well, now in March, 2016, our country has neither submitted to God's authority nor is even interested in His authority.  We are embracing Presidential candidates who see no need for a personally involved God in any way.  As a church, and as a church leader, we need to wholeheartedly embrace the principles on which the first church was founded:  Salvation is found in no one else, for there is no other name than Jesus, given to man, by which we must be saved (see Acts 4:12).  If you're not a follower of Jesus, I should do all I can to show you Jesus, NOT tell you how far off you are from what I believe or expect you to honor the Word of God.  If you are a follower of Jesus, I should discover, with you, what God's Word says about everything, NOT try to make the Bible say what I think it should say or allow cultural norms to determine correct biblical interpretation.

May we earn our voice the way Jesus did.  As He was approached by a self-righteous rich man who declared his own righteousness, Jesus knew how far he was from the Kingdom.  Yet, Scripture says in Mark 10:21, "Jesus, looking at him, loved him . . . "  There is a compassion and love for those who are "far off" that is missing from the Evangelical community.  By the grace of God, may we capture that and boldly live it out.  At that point, our voice will be heard more and the counter-cultural, life-giving message of Scripture will be heeded. . . only by God's grace.

Voting and living . . . mutually exclusive?

It's Super Tuesday, the day after Leap Day, which also means that I get to enjoy another every-fourth-year activity - The Summer Olympics.  What do all of these things have in common besides all happening on the same year?  For our purposes here, they all offer a different view regarding what matters more:

1.  Having the right president.
2.  Showing up respectfully, on the international stage of athletics.
3.  Using our time wisely.

America was founded on principles of government which has checks and balances and has an organization that requires cooperation.  On top of all of that, every single person must do their part in order for America to be what American was meant to be - a truly diverse conglomeration of people all working together to create a place of mutual respect, under the hand of Almighty God.  Even if not everybody believes in God or even the same thing about God, the foundation must be respected, for there is no other foundation on which mutual respect can be built.

First, in full disclosure, I'm not even a citizen, yet.  Born in Canada to Canadian parents, I've lived in America since I was 4 years old and have no plans of leaving.  My convictions, though, are very American, because my wife and six kids are American and I pastor a congregation that votes and lives fully in America.  Mostly, though, I love the fact that we have a pretty good system of voting in leaders fairly often, thus revealing where we're at as a culture.  What do we see as important?  Where do most of this think we should be heading?  Well, we answer these questions by how we vote and, for better or for worse, we have to live with our decisions.  This is where the LIVING and VOTING come in.

Back to voting.  Maybe you have already written me off because I haven't chosen to become a citizen by now.  You have a right to do that, yet my influence on this country, or even in my little part of this country, is not dependent on whether I can vote, whether I vote, or, dare I say, who I vote for.  My influence is dependent on how I prepare those around me  and whether I'm faithful to my God when a friend asks me, as I enter the local coffee shop, "So, Paul, how should a Stearns County Evangelical vote?"

Voting steps to follow:
1. Know what you believe and why.
2. Know the candidates and what they believe.
3. Vote appropriately.

How Christian living intersects with voting:
1.  Be aware of your culture and why people vote how they do.
2.  Love and respect each and every person around you, just as Jesus would.
3.  Submit to the authority that is voted in, even if you didn't vote for them.
4.  Speak of Jesus, often and accurately, even if it turns out to be illegal.

The latter of the two lists, by far, requires the most energy and thought and conversation.

May I submit to you that, even though voting is necessary and important, living out what is behind our voting convictions matters immensely more than even convincing somebody to vote a certain way (or NOT a certain way).

Real change happens beyond simply "liking" our chosen candidate.  It requires living out our convictions, no matter who wins, whether our candidate is all they said they would be, or even whether our belief in Jesus Christ is poo-pooed by most of our country.

Be faithful in your vote.  Don't put much hope in the results.  Our hope is in the Lord.

Everyone Worships . . . But Whom?

Robert Sarver, owner of the NBA Phoenix Suns, recently made some overgeneralized statements regarding "millenials" and how social media has effected them.  He has received much criticism from, guess who, the sports media which has benefited greatly from the escalation of social media over the past few years . . . hmmmmmm.  But is there some truth to this part of his quote: "But the other thing is, I’m not a fan of social media. I tell my kids it’s like Fantasy Land. The only thing people put online are good things that happen to them, or things they make up. And it creates unrealistic expectations."?

To be sure, you're asking for criticism when you make sweeping judgements and when you're a rich person that is already viewed as someone who is out of touch with the real world.  Yet, where do the rest of us (meaning those who are NOT filthy rich or even somewhat rich like professional athletes) get our reality from?  One finds out rather quickly on trending search engine sites, news sites, or sports sites what the "real world" wants to pan off as reality (see huffingtonpost.com, sports.yahoo.com., or bing.com for examples, which I just did and promptly wasted 15 minutes that I'll never get back :-{).

Webster's 1828 Dictionary (arguably, the purist dictionary around), gives the following as the first two definitions of REALITY:

1. Actual being or existence of any thing; truth; fact; in distinction from mere appearance.

2. Something intrinsically important, not merely matter of show.

It takes research, personal knowledge, or insider information to get to the reality behind what the public sees and perceives about anybody.  All of these things take time and desire, which leads me to one final quote, from Bob Dylan: It may be the devil, or it may be the Lord, but you're gonna have to serve somebody.

When I spend my time pursuing MY reality, whether it's my job, my favorite team, my next paycheck, or even my family, I am deciding whom, or what, I worship.

When I spend very little (if any) time understanding and pursuing the BIG PICTURE reality of who made this world, who runs it, who owns it, and who is really in charge, I am choosing to ignore REAL reality and choosing to serve MY reality.

In response to Sarver, some ESPN personalities have argued that "millenials" are actually more aware of the world than any other generation because of social media.  What world are they more aware of, though?

The determining factor of how well people handle social media (millenials or not) has more to do with their grasp on REAL reality than their age.  So, I would submit that you make a point of knowing your Creator, the only God, the God of the Bible, the Author or REAL reality.  Yet, you can do what you want, "But if serving the LORD seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your forefathers served . . . or the gods . . . in whose land you are living.  But as for me and my household, we will serve the LORD." (Joshua 24:15 from The Holy Bible).

Who do you choose this day?  How will you serve?

Called to Live

• What's the difference between someone who does a job and someone who enjoys a job?
• What's the difference between an athlete who gets paid to play a sport and an athlete who has a positive effect on a community?
• What's the difference between a student who wants to graduate and a student who wants to make a difference?

I suggest to you that the difference is directly proportional to how much a person is willing to humbly submit to the right authority and to readily listen to the unpopular.

• Is there somebody you work with that stands out as somebody who really enjoys it?
• Is there an athlete you know of that, if they left their team/community, they would be missed beyond their athletic ability?
• Is there a student who seems to have another goal beside just getting through school?

Go ahead, ask them, "What is up with you?" (or something like that :-).  Find out who they listen to or what drives them or why they do what they do.

How do you listen, though, when you're not sure anyone worthwhile is speaking?  There were times when God chose to be silent, or very quiet.  For instance, around 1100 B.C., there was a boy named Samuel who was trying to be faithful to this same God, even though he really didn't know much about Him.  Samuel had no idea what it meant to listen to God, or whether God spoke at all, or THAT He would speak directly to him.  Yet he did!  Why?  We don't know for sure, but I can say, for sure,  that God has never, nor will He ever, leave His creation high and dry, to fend for themselves, without an answer.

We also are able to witness, in I Samuel, chapter 3, that Samuel had what God was looking for (and still looks for today) - a humble attitude and an ear ready to hear anything.  Granted, it took until the 4th try for Samuel to actually know that it was God;  then, though, he responded immediately and proved that he listened mainly to . . . someone else.  This chapter holds the details of Samuel's "calling" and sets the stage for the life of a man who didn't do things unless God told him and who did do the things that hardly anybody else in his day was thinking about.

We, as human beings, are called to live life to the full and, based on the truth about our beginnings, this full life can only come when God is the one we're following, seeking, and honoring.  Here's where life becomes something that we LIVE, not just DO:  "Whoever tries to keep his life will lost it, and whoever loses his life will preserve it" (Luke 17:33).  First, give up trying to solve everything on your own, especially the whole mess about what happens after we die - give it all up to God, make it all about Jesus and his death on the cross in our place, and allow Him to be Who it all depends on.  I know it's hard, I know it's not natural, and I know it speaks against almost everything inside of us - yes, it's the epitomy of an humble heart.  Second, be in a posture and habit and attitude of readiness to hear anything from someone else (your Creator, Savior, and Sustainer), for daily direction.  Remember, you did not choose to live, you aren't here by chance, and you are known.  Therefore, you are CALLED TO LIVE, by a personal God, for a specific purpose, to a specific place, with only Him to please (oh, and, remember, He already loves you loads).

I am free, then, to live life to the full because it's all for Him.  He'll take care of my needs, my significance, and what ultimately happens to me as an employee, an athlete, a student, a homemaker, a wife, a dad . . . you get it!

The Beauty of Submission

I can hardly wait 'til I meet with John, because I know he's going to confront me on my gambling problem, which I don't think is a problem.  In fact, I'm really looking forward to hear his side of the debate on whether it's a sin or not to spend hundreds of dollars on these sites, which is just another form of entertainment, really! 

Does this quote look familiar?  Probably not.  If we're involved in something that may or may not be wrong, yet enjoy it and justify it's existence, the last thing we invite is someone's opinion that it's an outright SIN.  I mean, how rude of them, right!  When is it right, if ever, to confront someone with questionable behavior?

Allow me to give you another sports analogy.  A professional baseball player is going through a hitting slump (all of them do, by the way).  At the same time, the hitting coach notices that he is reverting back to some old habits that are contributing to the slump.  What is the coach's responsibility, at this point?  Some would say that it depends on who the batter is and on what kind of instruction this coach has provided in the past for this batter.  Some would say that, since he's the hitting coach, he has the right and obligation to approach the batter and explain what he sees.  Somehow, someway, he does need to let it be known what is clear to him even if these things are undetected by the batter or even others.  One main reason is because THAT IS WHAT HE'S THERE FOR!

Now, the batter has a choice as to what he does with this information.  The beautiful, attractive part of him deciding to listen and put into action what the hitting coach says is that he is willingly saying, "I don't have all the answers and I need others to help me." As a result, the other players see his example of humility (always beneficial), the team benefits from his increased production, and the hitting coach is affirmed in his role, giving him more confidence and courage to address other things that his hitters are doing wrong.

A church, in the true, biblical definition of the word, is a gathering of people who are like-minded about who Jesus is and what He accomplished on the cross and in his resurrection.  It's a group of people who all recognize their need for Jesus' death to cover the consequences of their sin (eternal death and punishment in hell) and their need for Him to give them power over the daily struggle with sin.  This is why the Bible gives over 40 direct commands relating to "one another."  A church that gathers without submitting to each other or supporting leadership that can wisely address sin is not, technically, a God-honoring church.  Rather, it become a club where each person has their own interests in mind or a service organization where they provide physical help without offering any spiritual help.

Again, the beauty of a group of people submitting to one another and it's affirmed leadership can be equated to the beauty of a team where each person practices hard, knows their role, and corrects their issues so that the whole team is seen as a "well-oiled machine" by the end of the season.  It's beautiful because it's a WHOLE, not just a bunch of individuals.  It's beautiful because people learn to look out for each other.  It's beautiful because THAT IS WHAT THE CHURCH IS THERE FOR! 

As a conclusion, let it be noted that when submission is ugly, it's because, in our first example, the player wants to do it himself and refuses (either passively or actively) or the coach demands change or simply does not seek input from others or the player.  In both cases, there is no submission, only rebellion or heavy-handedness.

So, first submit yourself to Jesus Christ, acknowledging your sin and need for Him as Savior.  Next, submit yourself to a God-fearing, Bible-driven, Jesus-honoring group of believers by committing to a local church.  The beauty that is produced will be truly amazing!

The importance of EQ

On the website for the Institute for Health and Human Potential (IHHP), I took their Emotional Intelligence (EQ) quiz.  I was congratulated for having high emotional intelligence!  Yea!  The way my emotions fluctuate from day-to-day, and even hour-to-hour some days, I wonder how people manage with low EQ.  Anyway, they gave me some good advice in the midst of my results:
Areas to work on: While you are doing well, don’t forget to take time out of your busy day-to-day activities to stop and reflect on what brings you the greatest meaning in your life. If we fail to do this on a regular basis, we risk becoming tranquilized by the trivial, sedated by the small details.

Here's the rub:  What if what brings the greatest meaning to my life is in direct conflict with what brings the greatest meaning to your life?  What if my wife derives great meaning from settling down in a small town and I derive great meaning from thriving in a big city?  Oh, so my wife, then, ought to be the greatest meaning in my life so that there's never a question of the two of us being in conflict, right?  What if her EQ is much different than mine and I start relating better with someone else?  What then?

Because EQ is so closely related to key relationships, and our relational needs are God-given, I am a firm believer that our spirituality must be a key component to how we process our emotions.  Because there is ONE Creator (work with me, here) then there is a certain, all-encompassing truth that each of us can subscribe to that will guarantee that my "great meaning in life" will dovetail beautifully with yours.  Pete Scazzero, through his Emotionally Healthy Spirituality website and ministry, teaches and trains others to teach the truths that we start with a right relationship with our Creator and then take that relationship into working on our right relationships with others, starting with those closest to us.

From IHHP.com to 7 Habits of Highly Effective People to Dr. Phil, the truth of who we are, how we are made, and what makes us successful is deeply rooted in our Creator, whether these popular resources and people publically acknowledge it or not.  Go ahead, take any good advice that "proven" or pop psychology promotes and compare it to what God says in the Bible.  If it doesn't match, proceed with much caution, and if it matches, acknowledge the Inventor of that truth and run with it under God's guidance.

Back to the aforementioned rub.  Read the last part of the IHHP website quote above.  If we fail to, individually and together, reflect on our dependence on God and our need for salvation through Jesus Christ, "we risk becoming tranquilized by the trivial, sedated by the small details."  Where we live, what we sacrifice for our spouse, and how we give of our time and resources truly becomes no big deal because we've reflected on and understand the big picture which God is already orchestrating.

EQ is important, but only as far as we are willing to process it in light of our relationship with God.  Increasing EQ without God is like increasing IQ without thinking.  Think about it.

Marriage, a Means or an End?

What are some key ingredients in the recipe for "losing your passion"?

• Make sure you see all your relationships as ways to get what you want.
• Never ask the "Why?" question when deciding how to spend your free-time.
• Look at your job as mainly a means to get money.
• View money as the end, rather than a means to more important things.

Ultimately, we lose passion for living and we lose perspective in our day-to-day lives when we neglect, forget, or never look into how it all begins.  Why do I have all these relationships?  What is the best use of my free time?  Why does the company exist that I work for and what is my role?  Why does money drive so many people and does it really fulfill its promises?

Marriage is no different, for if marriage is the goal, then we can define it how we want and we can determine our (and others') worth based on it.  We get into the marriage and, sometimes sooner and sometimes later, we ask ourselves, "Is this all there is?"  It's not a commentary on our spouse, but rather on our false expectations of marriage.  Even the most important person in our earthly life was never intended to fill our void (no matter how great the movie line is, Jerry Maguire).

Why does the nagging inner voice keep asking, "Is this all there is?"  Because the most important relationship we could ever hope of having has been tainted forever.  You and I have something in common - it's our need for complete communion with our Creator.  We fill this void with money, people, success, power, pleasure, etc.  We experience short term satisfaction and enjoyment but we know, at the heart of it all, that it just didn't cut it for us.

Back to marriage.  Because marriage, then, was never meant to fill the void or "complete" anyone, what is it for?  It is a means (and a very important one according to Genesis 3:24 and Ephesians 5:22-33) to showing someone what love looks like and that Jesus is the ultimate lover, dying for our sins, in our place.  If God is our most important relationship, and Jesus is the means to reconciling with our God, then selfless, heterosexual, only-one-spouse marriage is the only definition of marriage that can help us get back to God.

Yes, many heterosexual marriages are selfish.  In fact, one could argue that, on any scale that a person could invent, many homosexual marriages have more redeemable qualities than many heterosexual marriages.  But this is no reason to redefine marriage.  After all, who am I to doubt the true love of a teacher for her 16-year old boyfriend/student?  Without some sort of guidelines and standards of what's appropriate and what isn't, we are all reduced to our own definitions (and we all know what wins when our feelings have war with our self-imposed standards).

Who should define marriage then?  Allow the Inventor of marriage to define it, run with that definition, and enjoy marriage for the means to see God that it was meant to be.  Or, define marriage the way you see fit, see it as an end in itself, and constantly come up against a dead end on the road of a life that is truly full of life.